A tough decision

                      A tough decision

There are eight teams in throw ball from each department which are divided into two groups, four teams in each. I was surprised to know that our department did not qualify for last six years. They not even win a single match for last three years and this year they only wants to win a single match. On the other hand our departmental football team have won four titles in last six years and they are also the defending champions.

    I had to choose between them. I can go with my football team or I can improve our departmental woman throw ball team. One side has past glory and the other has past failure. There are many junior players in our football team and many of them are better than me so they can replace my position but the throw ball team has hardly ten-twelve players and most of them were absent and irregular. They are only playing for a participation certificate.

   The legacy is already made in the football team and if I choose this I will just be a player of a winning side but if my presence makes any difference in the throw ball team and more over if the team wins, I can be a member of a first time throw ball winning team from our department. For the first time I got a chance to create history for our department so I choose throw ball over football.

   The next day was Saturday and there was no class after recess. In the morning Aditi, the captain of the side said me that they are going to held a practice session after the college and my presence is very important. She also mentioned all of the team members will come today. I was keen to know about the player who was very irregular and absent most of the days that's why I had to take her position in previous practices.

Chapter-2 || Spring in the desert

                            Chapter-2

                   Spring in the desert

     August ends. This is the eventful odd semester of our college. It starts with Teacher's Day then annual sports and ends with tech fest and annual function.

It's been a long time since our conversation ends in facebook and my inquietude about that incident is going but my habit of seeing our old chats has not gone. In this days I am only trying to concentrate on football as the annual sports are coming. So I start practicing football with my friends.

One day I was passing through our college campus and saw some  girls of our department are doing catching practice with a football. I go towards them to ask about the game. They said that the name of the sport is throw ball. Two teams with eight players each will throw a ball over the net where a member of the other team tries to catch the ball and quickly throw it back across the net. They ask me to play with them as one player of their team has not come. As I had some time before my football practice, I decide to play with them. I think it will be exciting to play with fifteen girls. Sometimes later I find interest in that game. I was late for my own practice but throw ball was very interesting so I decided to skip my practice for that day. The next two days I didn't go to college as I got fever. You can call it 'the silence before the storm'. The next day I saw them again playing and they were really struggling. I went to them, they told me that there is again a player absent for the practice. I take that place that day again. Somehow I was attached with the game. We make plans and trying to execute that. As I was a football player I had ability to throw a ball higher with speed and that helped them in their practice. Aditi who was a good friend of mine and also the captain of the side asked me to join them as their mentor. It was quite a surprising offer for me, also I have my own football practice. So I can't give them assurance but I make a promise to be in their practice.

Full Stop in Facebook

I text her.

'Are you in college? If you are, please meet me in front of our departmental building'

But there is no response.

In the evening when I was again trying to study the 'Binary search algorithm', she text me.

'Sorry I was in the lab, then direct home from there, didn't see your message. But why did you want to meet me?'

'I will tell you when we will meet'- I replied after sometime.

There are no conversation that day.

In the very next morning I text her to inform me when she will in the college. I don't know what she thought but she replied - ' I am not going to college today, and why I have to inform you ?'

Her this reply make me feel insulted. A junior is arguing with me, it was not accepted then.

Suddenly spring was gone and drought of summer appear in our chat box.

I clear my intention that I want to meet her only for discussing about the teacher's day program as we need a female singer. But according to her my way of asking was not right.

Yes I was wrong then. I already got down in front of her eyes and didn't want to fall more so I stop arguing.

So that was our last conversation in Facebook.

The wise people once said, "If you love someone set them free." I never texted her back in Facebook. But this is not the end. Our life is too short than our stories.

Teacher's Day

Our conversation was building day by day. For the first time everything was going perfectly and I found loveliness in my daily activities. We didn't talk too much but our conversation was efficient. Slowly we were showing interest on each other. On the other hand I was not showing any excitement and kept my roude senior like behaviour. I didn't have her number, I never asked for it though. Actually I never thought about it. Suppose I had her number, what should I do next? Could I call her without any reason? Could I call her and discuss about our weal and woe? Can I? The answer is "NO". So what was the necessity of her number?

      Three days later I was in my college sitting in the canteen with my friends and everyone was excited about the teacher's day program except me. They present a list of names who were going to participate. Suddenly I found my name on the list as guitarist. Yes I do play guitar but I never apply for this. As I was one of the member of performing art forum, I can't resist them. They said that they need a female singer in the music segment. Suddenly a plan run through my head.

The Conversation

I snatch my phone from him but don't cancel the request. By scrolling down her profile I found that she is from our department, one year junior than us and she is also a singer. After the class I was with my friends having snacks and tea, discussing about the assignments, lectures, projects etc. As we are now in the third year, everyone is serious about their study and placement. Even I thought that I will study hard from this semester, actually I thought that after every semester though. The atmosphere was so serious around me and I was pretending to be serious but deep in my mind I was devastated. 

"Is it okay to send a friend request to a unknown person? After all it's just a friend request not anything else" I told myself. Within few minutes a notification is popped up on my phone. 'Meghna Chakraborty accepted your friend request'. I was thinking is it the right time to start a conversation? But what is right, what is wrong , who decides? Is right or wrong, good or bad really exist? There is no right time for anything, I motivate myself and put my all courage together and type "Hi". Few minute elapsed but there was no reply. It was too early to expect a reply. I joined the conversation again. Now the discussion is on organizing teacher's day function in our college. Seriously I don't have any interest on that. I take my bag and set out for home. There was too much traffic and I hardly found a auto. Any other day this traffic disturb me but not that day. The whole city looks different in that afternoon. My wait in this traffic is not bigger than my wait for her reply. Some how I reached my home.

      In that evening when I was with my books and trying to understand the binary search algorithm my phone popped up with another notification.

'Hi', She replied.

I don't waste any time and asked 

' you are from first year computer science right?'

'Second year presently' , she replied.

'Are you singer?', I asked again.

'Yes I do sing', she replied.

'You in which dept?', she asked

First time she asked me something and I replied with gravity.

'I think there is no proper introduction between seniors and juniors, that's why you don't know me. I am from third year CSE'

In this way our conversation goes on. I made my mind that I should build the conversation slowly and show some interest on her, on the other hand I have to keep my attitude like a senior. Just like a test match the pitch was good in Day 1, Day 2, Day 3 but in 4th day it caught the crack.

Chapter 1 - Friend request

I exactly don't remember the date but the day was very boring.  I was in the java laboratory with my friend Aritra discussing about the lack of girls in the engineering college and how tough it is going to be for the future generation. As the lectures were going over my head, I decided to go outside for a bit refreshment. After having a cup of tea when I was entering into our college that moment I saw her for the first time. Sun rays were falling directly on her face but it was not annoying her. Her hair was partially on her right shoulder shinning in the sunlight. I saw her coming.I thought I will casually look into her face when she will come closer but when she was actually in front of me I can't took my eyes away from her. Her deer-eyes were searching for something. I forgot my existence for a moment. She was looking very simple and her simplicity was slaying me. I quickly control my nerves and return to my java laboratory. I was still thinking about her and the lectures were going miles over my head. I cannot control my feelings. I don't know you believe in love at first sight or not but my heart was crushed by her first sight. I asked Aritra about her by describing her look and why I was asking him because he had all the information of all the girls of our college and he was very famous among them. Astonishingly he recognize her and said to me that she is one of his college crush. He open facebook from my phone and type her name 'Meghna Chakraborty' and send her a friend request.

Only My Love Story

                            

                              Preface

I am completely new in this blog writing field.I never take content creation as my carrier, never thought of earn money from it.I saw some of my friends and senior having some job on content writing, basically those are technical.But I will write non technical stories in my blog.I never wanted to be a writer but what to do! I am also a defeated fighter of love, and writers are born from every wound of that fighter.What we expect it does not happen accordingly specially for me. Experienced from my previous relationships everytime after some days or months it seems like boring, I don't know was it for choosing wrong person or this is the feeling of love?But for the first time I thought that I choose a right person. Wait a minute, everytime I thought that but seriously it was like once in million times like Avengers endgame. I choose a right person but relation is not depends on only one person, it's like a two way traffic.But love is not like that, and I am telling you I was in love because after 7 months of no contact I am still writing this for her. Not for her actually I want to give our(my)story an eternity. Because all the like, love and affection is only from my side.The journey was started from my college gate and ended with a phone call. This week I am not going to tell you that story. But still whenever I read her old messages or when she double tapped on my instagram picture, I feel it will begin again.But according to Adam - ' The end is the beginning and the beginning is the end'. Now don't ask me who is Adam. It is too much for today. See you all with the "chapter 1" of "Only my love story" in next week.